«On the first day of the war I had panic, just shock. Just like in 2014, it felt like the sky had fallen to the ground.

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2014 was the year we made the decision to leave Russia, and it's all my husband’s credit - I was very reluctant to part with my Saint Petersburg life.

Back then in 2014 I was very scared, and it seemed that a great war was about to start right then. That everyone was about to understand everything! But no one understood anything, except for a couple of people.

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It seems to me that the threshold for indifference in Russia is higher than elsewhere. A learned survival strategy - I see nothing, I hear nothing. Even soldier mothers now, unlike in the Chechen war, don't look for their children.

 

I am afraid that my children will not see their grandmothers. I am afraid that I can no longer be proud of anything good that was in Russia, no longer have the right.

Is there a chance to look at things in a more complex way now? I don't think so. A mere fact that there are also good people in Russia won't change anything anymore».